Another approach to being rejected is to set up camp on the chopping block. Stay in it. Set yourself up for rejection a lot. Increase your Rejection Opportunity (RO) rate
| This is a 3 part series on rejection. Doing it, avoiding it & embracing it. |
Some of us can’t get out of the idea that gate-keepers are the way to our success. If you’re one of these, I encourage you to not half-ass it.
Make each one smaller
If you have two great ROs instead of one RO, they each have 50% the chance of crushing your spirit. The more you get, the more each one is diluted.
Make your life bigger
Try to setup each RO as casually as possible while still respecting the work you’re putting in. When your calendar has only one thing in a day and it’s “Jeep Audition…” that’s not amoré. At least schedule a lunch with a friend afterward.
Diminish Approval
Celebrate the work, not the result. Give yourself a pat on the back for every RO you do, not for getting the gig. The gig is luck. The work is the submissions.
Eventually you’re thinking “my job is to go do a great interview. Not to be chosen.”
Play like a pro
Here’s a list of most-rejected books Stephen King’s first book was rejected by 30 publishers. These were not emails. This was hunting for viable options at the library and bookstores (pre internet)? Learning the rules of submission for each publisher. Making phone calls, writing letters by hand. Each letter has to be good. You’re an author. Taking letters and books to the post office. Waiting. UGH! How long would it take me to get 30 rejections like this? Maybe over a year? It was his first book, too, so he didn’t know if he’d ever sell one.
It’s practice
Every RO is a rehearsal. Like basketball practice, you don’t get much better at each practice. It’s slow, but every job interview you go on, or every rejection letter you get may have a tiny little hint that can help on the next one. Like free-throws, you need to pile up a lot of hints before you really get what’s up. Did Stephen King just find the right publisher, or did he get better at submitting? Maybe both.
If you do the bare minimum, you’re winning
I got to sit through a day of commercial auditions in a big casting director’s studio. I wasn’t involved in that casting, so I could just watch. OMG, you guys! It was bad. People sweating, not prepared, not listening to instructions, trying to joke with us to charm us, and more! There were 68 professional actors that day and I thought 3 of them could do the job at all. I’m not saying there were 3 standout great ones – there were 3 not terrible. Those 3 and a few others got call backs.
For Scot Nery’s Boobietrap, I tell people “Please send us a video of a short ACT to submissions@boobietrapshow.com ! Each act in Boobietrap gets 4 minutes on stage! Also, note specific dates for limited availability situations. Always glad to find a place in the show for the best acts in the world! Thank you ?” Most people don’t follow the instructions.
Learn the basics of what the rejector wants from you, and do those things because most people won’t.
Get more
If you want to get in this game of rejection hoarding, you can’t wait for rejection to come to you. You gotta put yourself out there as much as possible. If you can’t find enough ROs that are right for you, do a few that aren’t right for you. It will help affirm they’re not right, give you practice, and keep you in the flow.